08 December 2024

Toxic Game For Two

Hazel eyes, chocolate skin - a summer evening, where the dream begins.

Your lips, like oranges, sweet and bright - a citrus kiss in the heat of night.

Your touch so soft is melting me in a fiery sway.

A foreign taste, both warm and new; yet I can’t figure out this essence of you.

A spark of poison, a tempting thrill.

Addictive pull, a dangerous game - I can't resist it; I love to play with the flame.

Let me crave this forbidden pleasure - like a snake’s bite, it feels so right.

I sense the danger yet I can’t move on;

It started affecting me - I thirst more.

You’re a mystery I can’t quite solve; a rare delight, spiced with fire.

There’s something in your scent, a note I almost know - familiar, yet elusive;

I feel you like a place I’ve yet to go.

Your voice carries a rhythm so foreign that it pulls me in,

Unravels my core leaving me craving, yearning for more.

In my dreams, you live like a soft refrain,

Closer than anyone, yet driving me insane.

You blur the edges of what feels secure and well-known,

You are my thrilling chaos I can't help but keep on coming for more.

Here you are, keeping my mind wide awake,

Every thought of you I compare to a liquor – so dangerous, so mild, so warm.

Are you the hunter, or am I the prey - the lines blur with each passing day.

So let’s play this out, let’s write this story;

Push me, pull me – you claimed me as your own – this dance is not that easy;

This chase of minds, this waltz of chance—an unorthodox, forbidden dance.

 …

I’m the smooth shot that hits your veins,

A buzz you can’t shake, a high that remains.

I am your designer high, so custom-made - that kind of thrill you can’t evade.

When the hunter flips, becoming the prey caught in the rush, you bent to my will.

Pleasure takes over, no time to retrace— this round is mine, I’m winning the chase.

I crave the rush of chocolate and fruit – so sweet and yet so bold;

You’re my plaything in this fucked-up scene - I keep it chill while you chase the dream.

The roles flip fast, we’re caught in this heat, - who takes the crown, who admits defeat?

Adrenaline junkies, we’re both addicted to the game - hunter and prey we’re both to blame.

Another conversation, another day fades way,

Until you realize—I’m the spider and you’re the fly, tangled in my silky web

So helpless to stray.

30 November 2024

Mundane Life

 


Some nights it’s hard to stay sane,

Drunk from memories of never happened, never meant to be,

Some days it’s hard to stay in my lane

Torn between the fairy and the witch within.

As we all know the life is not a fairytale with happy ending

Nor a tragedy of an epic journey to discover who we are.

In those nights of pain and misery I call you,

You are always so welcome in my home of emptiness.

The moments we share of forbidden pleasure

Is what keep me level-headed.

Chaos everywhere, not sure what am I supposed to do.

You are my anchor with a taste of poison,

My lullaby with tender voice, my human doll, my shameful all.

I am sorry that I treat you like an object but this is what agreed on.

You a simple mean of calmness when my mind is raging hurricane,

Your warmth is so intoxicating mixed with the sweetness of your skin,

You are my midnight kryptonite, my wicked half with inviting smile to sin.

I am sorry you can’t stay overnight, this is not the deal we signed

I call you, you come and serve your purpose.

Afterwards no conversations, no hugs, no nothing showing closeness

We are not that deep – we are each other’s puppets; this is not love.

I am sorry my dear, it’s time to break the deal.

You caught feelings, you want more than what I can offer, I am getting bored.

This was my last call, last minutes that we share in my time with you.

I have found another toy to play this game, no hard feelings.

You want a spouse, I want fun and if you can’t hold your part of the contract

I am terminating it for your own good.

It was nice to share some of my inner fire but if I knew you are getting burnt so quickly

I would have never offered you my chaos, nor the taste of my darkness. 

Damn, it is so sweet.

Some nights it’s hard to stay sane,

Drunk from memories of never happened, never meant to be,

Some days it’s hard to stay in my lane

Consumed by my new addictions, my new toys with a taste of liqueur mixed with strawberry

A pinch of salt and a little bit of void that absorb my emptiness.

New contracts, new days, new nights – this is how I see them all

A moment of desire and then back to the mundane tasks at hand.


23 November 2024

Bound to Fail

 



Sometimes we get hurt the most by those we call loved ones…

Pain, sadness, loneliness…

Are you the one who closed that golden door leading to the dreams coming true?

Are you the one who chose the silence when I needed your words the most?

Are you the one who buried into the ashes the most sacred feelings?

Are you the one who deliberately turned blind eye on me when I was crying my eyes out?

Are you the one who punished me for my choice and actions time and time again?

Are you the one – the Doombringer of my life – peaceful and quiet or hurricane and flood?

Are you the one who has always stayed by my side or the one who chose to leave one more time?

Are you the one who feel pleasure when those around him are in pain?

And here we are - the same old story written in the books from all ages.

You are the one who delivered the verdict and I am the one who feels when aches.

A toxic cycle of diminished self-respect and hatred, sadomasochism in its highest form.

But you are just a human, nothing godly in your presence, only words spoken in vain.

You are the one who loves to make me small every day until nothing is left

And I am the one who gathers all the misery and then turn it into a new monstrosity

Until one of us is tired and decides to leave, until then it is like an endless curse

We are bound to each other in unhealthy pleasure from unhealthy pain.