Oh my god, it’s you again, little princess I must say no.
I have
finally escaped your grip, your lips don’t shackle my neck,
The mist
I spread is no longer in me, I can finally breathe freely,
The lack
of your voice is so calming – silence is what I desire most.
I hope
my fingertips have faded from your skin, replace them with ink.
The tattoo
therapy will heal you over time.
I refuse
to reach the phone when your name shines on the display,
I don’t want
to hear your desperation,
I have
no urge to spend one more night with you.
I will break
this cycle – your shadows cannot reach me, you are not the ghost haunting me.
I no
longer grave your taste – once sweet now bitter – you are no longer the poison I
beg for every day.
My thoughts
have finally belonged to me, you are the dim silhouette I cannot recognize.
I am no
longer the potter, the clay touching my hands drives me insane – so dirty, so
rugged.
I prefer
to be painter in the studio with the canvas empty, ready to be filled in
colours of my liking.
Your voice
- once melody on repeat when my ADHD kicks in – now just chaotic sounds lacking
any meaning to me,
My resilience
is built up, unshaken – I stand unmoved by your pleas,
I have successfully
claimed myself for me.
…
Little princess,
I won’t visit you one more night,
Your scent
no longer enchants me, I am sharp and at last I am awake.
I love the
control I have gained when your absent, my freedom means the world to me.
I love
the discipline I enforced on me, I love to stay in my lane – my peace is my
order.
I no
longer follow foreign desires, I don’t need you pain to feel alive.
When your
chaos met my calmness last time I have finally realized
My end is
near every time I am with you.
Little princess,
your spells and magic no longer tempt me to enter your bed.
The broken
promises between us are no longer trap me in a chokehold,
The knots
once tied hard are now threads undone by my bare hands.
You and I
once disaster – now I refuse to participate in this annihilation.
My firm
boundaries will now protect me, I will unlearn you day by day in a steady pace.
You and I
– no longer lyrics I wish to whisper on my mouth
We are
not art born from passion and pain.
The healed
wounds will remain old scars I don’t want to reopen for you again.
We are not
seen as outlaws – I have no claim over your destructive tendencies.
My body
declines your offer, I no longer laugh in ache.
And with
a small effort I erase those moments spent with you,
Little princess,
I chose the peace of mind over your chaotic love.
Ultimately,
the normality you hate is what I seek most.
The last
time you pulled me closer I felt so alien to myself,
Now I finally
can feel what I am made of.
Take your
sweet tea, I refuse to drink this anymore.
I am no
longer drink my coffee with milk, I prefer to taste the bitterness over tour
fake sweetness.
You and I
together – fragments of different worlds but apart I can feel the wholeness in
my heart.
I hope
the last wound to heal, scar to fade and this play to stay forgotten.
No more
movies black-and-white, no more endless chaos – I chose to move forward;
No more
push and pull – this game is no longer on sale – in the end I am me.
…
Little
princes, I hope you eventually understand
I won’t
reach for you in the morning, I love the emptiness in my bed.
I don’t need
your kisses, I don’t fear the dullness of the grey.
No echo
of your begging remains in my head – I won’t ask to meet you.
I vowed
to quit you and managed to keep my promise,
Even my
skin is silent when I say your name out loud.
No shivers
run though my spine when I recall your soft whisper.
I am no
longer hungry for your shame and pain.
It was
never love, never meant to be – illusion of a cozy fire more like hellish
flames.
I am no
longer drawn to you, I walked away happy in the coldness.
I won’t
burn above your body, your touch lost its control.
There is
no countdown, the danger is long gone -
Finally,
I am whole again!!!
