I am wandering alone in the
darkness yet again,
Drunk again from the excruciating
pain and loneliness,
Drunk from the loss of long forgotten
dream.
…
I was longing to be someone else’s
support system,
I was longing to be some else’s
focal point,
I was longing to be some else’s
beautiful dawn,
I was longing to be some else’s solace,
I was longing to be some else’s
sunny day!
…
However, the dawn is not ready to
grace me with its presence yet,
The Sun set into my self-induced desperation.
And the moon screamed in front of
my poor judgement.
She brought the tide of tears,
engulfed my bright thoughts
As if my mind is covered with low
cliffs, no coasts;
The waves suffocated my desires!
I bid farewell to my impossible fantasies.
…
I am wandering alone in the
darkness yet again,
Drunk from the misery of my impaired
instincts.
I barely can see the furious fighter
inside me –
I am tired and alone.
I am trying to fight it, no
partner to correct my moves,
The ring of the starless night is
only mine.
I am absent-minded even though my dreams
Where to be someone else’s biggest supporter,
The cheerleader on the bench of happiness.
I don’t long anymore to be drawn
in the pool
Of somebody’s soft and cheerful laughter.
…
I am wandering alone in the
darkness yet again,
Drunk beyond my memory,
Please don’t make me explain how
hard is to keep me afloat
Of the big hole full of disdain.
The pains of the past mistakes no
longer serve me,
They keep me dead inside,
unmotivated to solve what troubles me today,
They killed what was left from me,
faded image of the days of easiness.
My drunken soul buried the flames
of life under the mud of self-loath,
It keeps me in this intoxicated
state not to lose control, detained.
No more sparkles, no more blue
sky,
What I am hungry for is the torment;
I feel the hunger for hatred and
shame,
I am infected with a new type of
virus,
More dangerous than cancer,
Spreading like a lake of wildfire
Until I am burnt in disgrace –
No memories – NEW FACE!
